crazy

its been like 2 years?

haha I totally forgot about this thing.

xanga has changed so bad.

it took me forever to figure out where the weblog button was :(

life is amazing :)

single but happy. I never thought I would feel that way but its given me a chance to concentrate on work. living in san diego again!

well talk?

I suppose if anyone remembers me haha.

I am bored :[

and I want to marry my girlfriend ahha.

but financially it just wouldn't work right now.

I got a new job. I paint houses ahha. not much of an improvement but it pays a hell of a lot more then the liquour store + I get tips :D. and I want to go back to San Diego BAD. but my girlfriend is sooo tight with her family it is almost sickening. shes like never been outside Wisconsin for more then a few weeks -_-. advice? ahah & I don't mean for her, for me. how can I pursue her? Cos I love her like !!!!!!!!!11 but the location. I can't stand it. once I graduate in about 2 years I want OUT. sigh.

I am selfish! but how could I NOT be, sd is amazing :].

wow. uhm xanga. haha. well its been quite a few months.

I just rediscovered it recently.

I almost forgot I had one.

the months have been good

I mean I am still hanging in there.

I got my own apartment no more living my my stupid uncle

and his shitty rules.

I have a girlfriend and things are going well. she is amazing and we have been together since august.

school is still eh. I am barely doing well but that should change once

I can quit my stupid job at the liquor store and

find one with more reasonable hours

and a job where stinky homeless drunks wander in at 4 i nthe morning looking for a bottle to add to their already pathetic  unorganized lives.

yes I do a lot of philosophizing when I am at that danmed liqour store.

birthdays soon. going to turn 19. pretty excited.

still havent talked to my parents. its been a year. no phone call, no visit no nothing. I suppose its official, I am a reject.

my uncles says they are the stubborn type and not to worry that everything will be just "dandy".

dandy? dandy. dandy?

hm. fuck dandy. I want average. tho my aspirations are high, as far as living standards and family situations go, avergae is just dannnnnnnndy for me. haha.

well toodles. hope I can get in contact with you guys again, all my old xanga buddies hope yall haven't forgotten about me :]

leave me a comment or whatever I want the conversation!

Why is it that girls make shit so fucking difficult.

Its like, you like them, and its never good enough. How you show it isnt good enough, what you say isnt good enough. After that I just figure, shit, I guess i'm not good enough!!!!! and I give up, not to be a jerk or anything of the sort, just to save my brain from exploding. And then once you sort of stop talking to them because of their unreasonable expectations, they fucking freak out on you and claim that your using them or that you think their ugly or something so out of the fucking question its ridiculous! And I'm sick of it! And then their like "Why dont you tell me whats bugging you" And I tell them, and I am a very honest sincere guy, and they turn into satan! and they scream and yell and cuss you out saying that i'm such a fucking asshole and blah blah blah.  And really I'm not! I am simply giving them the truth, the pure fucking truth, because thats what alllllllll girls claim to want. and you give it to them, and what do they do, they take as a fucking insult, and for that I pay the price. That is completley out of line! Maybe it is me! Hell, I dunno, i will admitt to my faults, but girls just cant seem to put down their fucking defensive attitudes, and negative thoughts, and simply understand and try and respect how guys think when they get like that.

>:[ clearly, i am having girl trouble.